Coming Soon to a
Wal-Mart Near You
it is summer now, which means that we all get to witness
more gems like this one.
Why do I have a feeling Jim Henson is behind
her......working her arms?
I think you might need something more than the pine tree
It’s a start......not where I would have
started.......but it’s a start.
C'mon now, on a scale of 1 to 10, where do you think
his level of 'giving a f***' is?
I am seriously
jealous of this dude.
only thing this guy is missing is a bedazzled jean
jacket to match his purdy pink sparkly bedazzled belt.
Hulk Hogan, guys with a full head of hair look stupid
with a ponytail.
Wanna take a guess how good it looks
without half your hair?
Hookers love cupcakes. I have nothing else to add to
that. Can’t argue with the facts.
don’t really know why Magic School Bus Lady is always at
Wal-Mart, because I don’t think they have
any of the
clothes she wears, nor do I know where you can find any
of the things she wears.
Why do I feel like at any minute now, a big arm-bar is
going to swing out with a STOP sign on it?
It would work, I guess...
Sasselfratz, hibidibut, yzidili, guvukafet…. Oh, don’t
I’m just trying to think of new words to
describe this lady
can’t seem to find any that already exist.
honey, the “ONE-SIZE-FITS-ALL” tag is lying to you,
so I suggest we try things on before we buy.
Your first move
should be checking that backpack for a pair of
If there are none in there, well, you ARE at
a store that sells underwear. Problem
I would move on to pants.......but...... I
don’t want to get too far ahead.........and lose you.
OOOWWW, she’s a BRICK (da-na-na-na) HOUSE.
MIGHTY- MIGHTY, just LETTIN’ it ALL hang-out.
'cuz you have the 'all-natural' sleeves thing goin'
doesn’t mean the rest of us are cool with you
wearing your tank top.
wonder if she can 'tie ‘em in a knot or tie ‘em in a
Because unfortunately, I already know they
'wobble to an fro’.
I cannot confirm if this is indeed THE Little Miss
Muffet. Mainly because I have no idea what a tuffet
one manage to make it look like they've tucked their ass
into their pants like a shirt?
humanity. How did we get to this point as a species?
know what a muffin-top is, but I’ve never seen a
I think there needs to be a better word
for it, so, I'm open to suggestions.
COME ON! Are you actually going to stand there and
tell me you don't even feel a breeze?
Hey! They don’t make 'tube-bottoms' for a reason.
sorry sir, but those Christmas hams put you over the 12
item limit for this line.
ATTENTION WALMART SHOPPERS: "Warm weather is now here
as we start the summer,
and so is the
unfortunate “Swamp Ass” epidemic. Be aware-- and try
to stay dry.
irony here is overwhelming. I’m just going to sit back
and let you soak it in.
OH DAMN, Santa is WORKIN’ it.
HEY! HEY! ---HOLD STILL!!! There’s a f***in’
jellyfish on your head!
HOLD STILL SO I CAN GET IT
Damn. Now THOSE are some titties. WAIT! Her head's on
he died, did Elvis get a poodle pregnant? I don’t know,
I’m not here to judge. Okay, I am, but still....
the hell did the White Witch of Narnia come through the
Blue is definitely your colour!
was not aware that barbers were still using the salad
bowl as a styling instrument.
That’s so cool! Jan Sport came out with a new flesh
wait….hold on….can it be…is it…..OH MY!
I would like to
officially nominate those pants for worst color option
EVER! Are you serious with that?
“Hey, let’s get
make them in sizes where the words
should be off-limits,
and then produce them in a flesh
color.” What a great idea!
really think ya gonna be needing those condoms there,
Want to look anything up?
for more pictures, stories, etc.