In Case You Missed It Dept.
The Navy was able to successfully
set a small boat on fire during the first at-sea test of its new laser
weapon. I think it needs more testing. Also, I've heard the Somali
pirates have a lot of small boats.
Senior White House adviser David
Plouffe described Donald Trump's remarks about the President as
"sideshow behavior". So... is he saying the Obama administration is a
White House Adviser David Plouffe
said that, later this week, President Obama will propose "significant
debt reduction". That should be easy. He just needs to do everything he
did in his first two years again, except backwards.
During a recent interview, Obama
complained about the downside of being President, saying, "I can't take
a walk." OK, then take a hike.
President Obama says he now
regrets his vote against raising the debt limit in 2006, as he is
currently arguing FOR raising the limit. I think Obama's been playing
too much golf. Politics doesn't do mulligans.
Democrat Congressman Jerrold
Nadler said the problem isn't that the country's broke, it's that "we're
just not taxing enough." Ya know, I was wondering when we'd hear the 2nd
Movement of the Tax & Spend Liberal Symphony.
In a recent
interview, CBS News anchor Katie Couric blamed her lousy ratings on weak
lead-ins from "local news stations". That, and widespread ownership of
After news of another air traffic
controller falling asleep on the job, Transportation Secretary Ray
LaHood said "we will not sleep" until this stops happening.
Joe Biden didn't get the memo.
The Center for Public Integrity
reports that the White House visitor logs are missing the names of
thousands of lobbyists and campaign donors. Well, technically it's OK,
since they're not really "visitors" so much as they are "investors".
-- Fred Thompson
Barack Obama refused Friday to
sign a bill paying U.S. troops, forcing them to either fight for free or
be court-martialed. It's hilarious. Leave it to America's first black
president to bring back slavery on the one hundred and fiftieth
anniversary of the Civil War.
Senate Democrats blamed the
massive federal budget deficits on Republican tax cuts Friday in TV
interviews. They said the wealthy aren't paying enough taxes to meet the
nation's needs. Democrats believe it is okay to be rich as long as you
just feel awful about it.
President Obama told a New York
City crowd Thursday that he just recently finished paying off his
student loans. That helps. The first job of the President of the United
States is to protect this country while his second job is to assure
China that he's good for the loan.
uranium enrichment factories were identified by a scientist Monday. They
are bad for the ozone. The plant converts uranium into gas, then filters
it through a centrifuge producing weapons-grade uranium, causing the
Israeli Air Force to be released into the sky.
The U.S. Court of Appeals in San
Francisco struck down Arizona's illegal immigration law allowing cops to
check citizenship. It was applauded in Los Angeles. Now that the all the
illegal aliens can go back to Arizona, Dodger Stadium will be safe for
The White House ripped Donald
Trump for always harping about President Obama's birth certificate.
Democrats did get some good news. Donald Trump just had his annual
physical and the doctor told him he was as sound as the dollar, so he
can't last much longer.
Obama urged people with large families to save energy by driving hybrid
vans. No automaker makes hybrid vans. You could say it really isn't the
president's job to know if there are hybrid vans except that he's been
running General motors for two years.
Atlas Shrugged opens in theaters
nationwide Friday. Its theme is that free enterprise creates prosperity
and government control creates poverty. So many conservatives will be
flocking to see this movie that theater owners are renting out the
lobbies for gun shows.
The Arizona Senate passed a bill
requiring presidential candidates to prove they are U.S. citizens before
they can be placed on the ballot. The state should also outlaw write-in
candidates. Last election, McCain and Obama finished behind Vicente Fox,
Felipe Calderon and Pancho Villa.
Obama gave his plan to balance the budget and reduce the debt in a
speech in Washington Wednesday. Joe Biden fell asleep during the speech.
No one wants to say the president tends to drone, but Pakistani
villagers now scatter at the sound of his voice.
Congressman Paul Ryan ripped
President Obama's speech Wednesday, saying it was a campaign speech not
a debt reduction plan. It's getting personal. President Obama said
Congressman Ryan's debt reduction plan would starve Americans, and he
promised that job to Michelle.
Congress will vote today on the
budget compromise which averted a U.S. government shutdown last weekend.
There's no guarantee it will pass today. If the U.S. government shuts
down, the number of things being brutally mismanaged dips by
ABC announced the network will
cancel its popular daytime dramas All My Children and One Life to Live.
They will be replaced by lifestyle shows on cooking. It's the worst
thing to happen to soap opera fans since The Clintons were canceled by
the two term limit.
Joe Biden fell asleep in the
audience while listening to President Obama's speech on the budget
deficit. The cameras caught him snoozing away. The vice president's
office said he wasn't being disrespectful, he was shooting a training
film for air traffic controllers.
Jesse Jackson was subject of a
harassment complaint by his gay travel assistant Tom Bennett. He said
Jackson made him get women for him at hotels. The complaint, filed in
Chicago, requests back and front pay, which is an idea he got from the
Escort Rate Card.
-- Argus Hamilton
Republicans and Democrats agreed
on a budget deal and a short-term funding
extension to keep this country
not moving forward.
President Obama laid out his plan
to reduce the $14 trillion national debt.
Unfortunately for Sasha and
Malia, it involves selling a lot of girl scout cookies.
Donald Trump challenged President
Obama to produce a birth certificate proving he was born in the United
States. It would anger a lot of people if it turned out Obama was born
in another country. The presidency is not one of the jobs that Americans
refuse to do.
Itís hard to believe that just
two weeks ago, people in Washington were talking about shutting down the
government in Libya.
A new poll shows that only 19
percent of Americans strongly approve of President Obamaís performance.
The other 81 percent donít own gas stations.
Obama said in an interview that
he really misses being anonymous.
If he wanted to remain anonymous he
should have run for vice president.
The price of gas in California is
almost $5 a gallon.
Coming into work, I passed a van packed with legal
President Obama wants to raise
taxes on the countryís richest people.
And you thought Donald Trump
hated him before.
on Americans to have more grandchildren.
Probably so thereís more of
them to pay off our debt.
Vice President Joe Biden fell
asleep during Obamaís speech.
He has now been named an honorary air
Another air traffic controller
fell asleep on the job, but he had a good excuse.
He was watching
President Obamaís deficit speech.
President Obama said he misses
being anonymous. He said that in the old days,
he could blend in with
all the other Hawaiian Barack Obamas.
Critics say itís illegal for
Donald Trump to run for president while hosting a TV show. Itís also
illegal to run for president if your hair wasnít born in this country.
Obama is set to appear on one of
Oprahís last shows.
Heís hoping itís the one where she gives away $14
for more pictures, stories, etc.